Flirting is never straightforward, especially when you’re uncertain if the girl you’re talking to is only into you as a friend or something more. Told ya, guys aren’t the only ones who play games! Contrary to popular belief, not every girl catches feelings after a hook up. SHOCKING. Sure, she might be flirting with you in all kinds of ways and giving you “signs” that make you believe she’s into you. BUT, the cold hard truth is there’s a high chance she doesn’t have feelings for you and is probably just keeping you around because she’s bored or likes the attention.
From a woman’s perspective, there are a few tiers of men in our lives — Tier 1: The straight platonic guy best friends, these are guys who will always be our best friends and you do not need to worry or get jealous of it being something more. Please don’t be that guy who always questions a woman’s motive with her guy best friends. Major turn off 101. Then there’s Tier 2: the singular guy we like, pretty straightforward, we want this guy to be our end game. Then comes the last and most complicated tier, Tier 3, the guys who are a little more than friends and fun to keep around but who you could never see a potential relationship with. Obviously Tier 3 guys don’t know that they don’t have a shot with you in the long term, but you keep them around because why the hell not? Who doesn’t love a little extra attention? And maybe a late night booty call?
As a dude, it can be hard to know what tier you fit into — there’s a blurred line between the last two. You could be perfectly happy in the last tier getting some action and no commitment, if so, this article is not for you, just keep doing your thang. But, if you’re confused as to what tier you fall under, I’m here to clear things up and help you from being stuck in the dreaded last tier. If a girl gives you any of these subtle signs, she’s definitely into you and your journey to Tier 2 begins now. If you don’t see these signs from the girl you’re talking to, you my friend, have been worse than friendzoned. I would cut that women’s attention cord and maybe, just maybe, if she comes running back, you might have a chance. Truth is, she probably has enough guys in her Tier 3 and one biting the dust makes no difference.
1. She’ll Ask A Lot Of Questions
If you feel like she’s been more talkative or intrusive with her line of questioning, it’s because she wants to get to know you better. She’s genuinely curious about your likes and dislikes to see if you both are compatible. Whether it’s to discuss last night’s episode of Game of Thrones or just a random “so, who’s your favorite Kardashian?”, a girl asking questions is a positive sign. Sometimes, girls will even ask questions that they already know the answer to just as an excuse to talk to you more. And if you’re genuinely interested back, the best way to show that is to ask a girl a question back instead of just answering her questions point blank. Showing interest is a two-way street.
2. She’ll Snap/Text You Inside Jokes
Maybe y’all talked about how you’re both addicted to soda, fast forward to the next morning when you get a snap and it’s a photo of her holding a soda with the caption “ugh, can’t quit”— bro, she’s into you. The fact that a little soda can can remind her of you is saying a lot, who knows, maybe a baby will remind her of your future JUST KIDDING. But really, if she’s snapping or texting you inside jokes from conversations you guys have had, you’re 100% on her mind and I would snap her back some witty responses.
3. Her Body Language
Body language is a huge indicator for figuring out if she’s into you, most women tend to get a little more “girly” when they’re into a guy. For instance, you might notice she’s blushing and giggling more, she’s a bit more fidgety than usual, or she might be using any excuse to touch/graze your arm. If she’s laughing at a lot of the things you’re saying, it’s not because you got funnier but it’s her way of flirting. Also, direct eye contact is key! If she’s looking right at you when you’re talking, she’s really taking in what you’re saying. A natural chemistry should be obvious to both of you if she likes what she sees in front of her.
Hint: If she’s tensed with arms folded or leaned back instead of forward when conversing, your charm is probably not working on this one…so accept the loss with dignity. At least you put yourself out there?
4. She’s Constantly Making Future Plans
You guys just had an awesome weekend hanging out and she’s already making plans for the next time you two will hang out, it’s because she’s planning on you being around long-term. If she plans events — like music festivals, birthdays, brunches — and asks you to join, that’s an indication that she’s thinking about a future with you (not in a “we’re getting married” kind of way, chill). She clearly enjoys your company and likes having you around, and is open to see where things go in the near future. Congrats, you didn’t completely repulse her!
5. She Develops an Interest in Your Interests
Does she repost some Diplo on Soundcloud just after you told her how much you loved Diplo? Or, does she all of a sudden start watching your favorite sports team play more? If a girl shows she’s curious about your passions, she’s probably trying to get to know you better and develop some common interests. She knows that if she checks out your favorite band or watches that movie you recommended, she’ll have something to talk about when she runs into you next. It’s quite flattering actually and you should definitely take note of this.
